Comments for Everydaystranger http://www.everydaystranger.net Just an ordinary girl living in extraordinary circumstances Fri, 12 Mar 2010 16:14:42 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 Comment on Mentor by Miranda http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/11/mentor/comment-page-1/#comment-51849 Miranda Fri, 12 Mar 2010 16:14:42 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4573#comment-51849 I just turned 36 last month. Those gray hairs are a definite reminder that I'm not in my 20s any longer either. While I still have the passion for work, I find my passion for my 2 kids and husband a bit more sustaining. I suspect young gal will, like us, not be the spanky-do-everything-all-the-time busy bee when she reaches her mid 30s. But do support her eagerness (while pulling in the reigns where needed) because it won't last foever. I just turned 36 last month. Those gray hairs are a definite reminder that I’m not in my 20s any longer either. While I still have the passion for work, I find my passion for my 2 kids and husband a bit more sustaining. I suspect young gal will, like us, not be the spanky-do-everything-all-the-time busy bee when she reaches her mid 30s. But do support her eagerness (while pulling in the reigns where needed) because it won’t last foever.

]]> Comment on Mentor by B. Durbin http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/11/mentor/comment-page-1/#comment-51848 B. Durbin Fri, 12 Mar 2010 15:47:53 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4573#comment-51848 Sounds frustrating but potentially rewarding. I hope you'll be able to get to a point with her where you can give her a Talk— not patronizing, but more of the "you know, I was you, and one thing I've learned over the years is it's okay to slow down a bit." Sounds frustrating but potentially rewarding. I hope you’ll be able to get to a point with her where you can give her a Talk— not patronizing, but more of the “you know, I was you, and one thing I’ve learned over the years is it’s okay to slow down a bit.”

]]> Comment on Mentor by Solomon http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/11/mentor/comment-page-1/#comment-51847 Solomon Fri, 12 Mar 2010 14:10:07 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4573#comment-51847 In my AF ROTC class at college, the Captain told us that people who have the same tendencies we do tend to rub us the wrong way. That didn't make any sense at the time, but now I see how right he was. I think it's natural to envy youth a little even if we wouldn't want to do it all over again even if we could. I miss being able to run a sub 6:00 mile, being able to stay up til 4:00am and get up for work at 7:00, and being able to eat 10 lbs of food a day without gaining any weight; but being 44 with a loving wife of 18 years, 3 angels (15, 12, & 2), and a job I'm good at and comfortable in is exactly where I want to be right now. It sounds as though you're in a similar place. In my AF ROTC class at college, the Captain told us that people who have the same tendencies we do tend to rub us the wrong way. That didn’t make any sense at the time, but now I see how right he was.

I think it’s natural to envy youth a little even if we wouldn’t want to do it all over again even if we could. I miss being able to run a sub 6:00 mile, being able to stay up til 4:00am and get up for work at 7:00, and being able to eat 10 lbs of food a day without gaining any weight; but being 44 with a loving wife of 18 years, 3 angels (15, 12, & 2), and a job I’m good at and comfortable in is exactly where I want to be right now. It sounds as though you’re in a similar place.

]]> Comment on Mentor by serena http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/11/mentor/comment-page-1/#comment-51846 serena Fri, 12 Mar 2010 13:18:43 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4573#comment-51846 You are handling this perfectly! Be firm, count to 10, do all the things your instincts tell you. Patience is a real talent! BTW...36 is NOT middle aged!! ;) You are handling this perfectly! Be firm, count to 10, do all the things your instincts tell you. Patience is a real talent! BTW…36 is NOT middle aged!! ;)

]]> Comment on What is Feminism? by Amy http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/07/what-is-feminism/comment-page-1/#comment-51845 Amy Fri, 12 Mar 2010 13:03:54 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4562#comment-51845 To me Feminism is about choice. Women and men should have the choice of how they want to live their lives. When I had my daughter here in the US I cried for a week when she turned 5 weeks. My husband asked why and my reply was that I didn't want to leave her and go back to work. This would be when he asked why do you have to do that? It was a moment of clarity and thought. I had been molded my society that I had to be a working mom, that is just what you do. I didn't want someone else raising my child. So I didn't go back to work. Instead I went back to school when she was 11 months old and got a BAS degree. Then I started my own photography business. I am not a normal woman or mother for my area, I have found a way to be there for my children when they are little and be able to contribute to my family's income. Yet I am still criticized for not having a "real" job. In the rural area we live in, a bedroom community for Orlando working really isn't an option. All of my paycheck would go to childcare, which is incredibly crappy care at that. So why not just stay home. When my children are in school I will happily get a job (if my business isn't what it needs to be) but at that time I will probably be judged for not being a stay at home mom. There really is no winning.. To me Feminism is about choice. Women and men should have the choice of how they want to live their lives. When I had my daughter here in the US I cried for a week when she turned 5 weeks. My husband asked why and my reply was that I didn’t want to leave her and go back to work. This would be when he asked why do you have to do that? It was a moment of clarity and thought. I had been molded my society that I had to be a working mom, that is just what you do. I didn’t want someone else raising my child. So I didn’t go back to work. Instead I went back to school when she was 11 months old and got a BAS degree. Then I started my own photography business. I am not a normal woman or mother for my area, I have found a way to be there for my children when they are little and be able to contribute to my family’s income. Yet I am still criticized for not having a “real” job. In the rural area we live in, a bedroom community for Orlando working really isn’t an option. All of my paycheck would go to childcare, which is incredibly crappy care at that. So why not just stay home. When my children are in school I will happily get a job (if my business isn’t what it needs to be) but at that time I will probably be judged for not being a stay at home mom. There really is no winning..

]]> Comment on Mentor by Bee Cee http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/11/mentor/comment-page-1/#comment-51844 Bee Cee Fri, 12 Mar 2010 10:50:15 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4573#comment-51844 Can we toss her in a bag with my direct report and see what comes out? I spend my day tearing my head out because mine doesn't think, isn't proactive, is negative, obstructive and has an over inflated impression of herself. You can't win can you? Love to all the Hampshire clan x Can we toss her in a bag with my direct report and see what comes out? I spend my day tearing my head out because mine doesn’t think, isn’t proactive, is negative, obstructive and has an over inflated impression of herself. You can’t win can you?
Love to all the Hampshire clan x

]]> Comment on Mentor by Paula http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/11/mentor/comment-page-1/#comment-51843 Paula Fri, 12 Mar 2010 08:58:38 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4573#comment-51843 Dont't let her feel your ambivalence, she will make use of it. She is your assistant, not your daughter, nor your friend nor your student. Show her your authority and set boundaries. You can still be nice to her later on, any time she might desperately need it once. You are the boss! Dont’t let her feel your ambivalence, she will make use of it. She is your assistant, not your daughter, nor your friend nor your student. Show her your authority and set boundaries.

You can still be nice to her later on, any time she might desperately need it once.

You are the boss!

]]> Comment on Mentor by Teresa http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/11/mentor/comment-page-1/#comment-51841 Teresa Fri, 12 Mar 2010 01:48:16 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4573#comment-51841 Ugh. I don't envy you one bit. Ugh. I don’t envy you one bit.

]]> Comment on Mentor by Felicity Jones http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/11/mentor/comment-page-1/#comment-51840 Felicity Jones Thu, 11 Mar 2010 23:53:55 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4573#comment-51840 Nice! Nice!

]]> Comment on Mentor by a http://www.everydaystranger.net/2010/03/11/mentor/comment-page-1/#comment-51839 a Thu, 11 Mar 2010 21:50:58 +0000 http://www.everydaystranger.net/?p=4573#comment-51839 You're showing great restraint - which is important because the youngsters know EVERYTHING! I remember. I was one too. I'm sure she will look back and value your guidance in 15 years. You’re showing great restraint – which is important because the youngsters know EVERYTHING! I remember. I was one too. I’m sure she will look back and value your guidance in 15 years.

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