Snowballs
I keep opening this tab to write something and then walking away from it. I meant to write something earlier but got caught up in time (which I always get snagged in, you know). We have a to-do list a mile long. This is perhaps what happens when you decide to host your own wedding reception.
The wedding is this weekend, and as of this morning it was the snowball starting down the hill. I went to work (Alastair is on leave). Tomorrow I go to work for a half day, then it’s off to the doctor’s (hello allergies!) and then on to a waxing of various bits and pieces. Then I’m off work.
Tomorrow night Melissa and Jeff arrive, thereby accelerating the snowball. Melissa turned 18 last week, and she has gifts waiting from us. I’m happy for her – she’s level-headed and sorting out that whole Rest of Her Life deal with aplomb. Jeff’s been struggling in Sweden and so will be here for a large chunk of the summer. I like to think that we can be this stable place for him, this place where he can trust that he’s safe and loved and listened to. I think he knows that, I just want him to always know it in that place in his heart where he holds all things he knows to be true. Both of the kids are very involved in and happy about the wedding, I just want him to know that I’ll always be here for him in the same way I’ve always been. Kids need families. These kids in particular.
On Wednesday the American clan arrive, thereby filling up the house and making the snowball into an avalanche. My Dad and stepmom land and are bringing with them toys, laughter, hope, and 3 dozen bagels. Laugh if you want but the bagels here, they don’t hold a candle to the good stuff from the US. My folks are beside themselves waiting to see “their babies”, as they call them.
I love my family so much it knocks my breath out.
The rest is coming together. As far as Bridezillas go, I’m the polar opposite. I’m so laid back about it I’m nearly comatose – Alastair’s mum asked if she could do the flowers, which I readily agreed to. She then asked me what kind of flowers I wanted and I told her that in all honesty I wanted whatever flowers she wanted to make. Similar lines for the cake – when asked by the world’s greatest baker what kind of cake, it pretty much came with little direction apart from “From the love of god, no fucking fruitcake!”
(As an aside, what’s up, my beloved second home country, with this loving of the fruitcake? Can we work this out, can we get this out of our systems?)
My dress is ready. I have an appointment booked for makeup and hair and, when asked how I wanted it done, I came out with “I have no idea, you tell me what you want to do.” I imagine I must be maddening in the extreme, but there are several things at play here:
1) I have no sense of style
2) I can’t decorate/arrange flowers/do makeup or hair to save my life
3) I’m sure people who can do items 1) and 2) know best and will do a better job if I don’t interfere
4) I’m pretty relaxed about the whole thing.
Alastair’s had some moments of stress but in general we’re all keeping it together. For me, I’m just so happy that the family is all together – parents are meeting parents, all four kids are here and happy, and the sun is out. What’s not to love?
The one thing I did have a strong opinion on is a silly thing – music. The place we’re getting hitched is very near and licensed for weddings, but they don’t have any access to musicians or music save for a CD player, which is being operated by my niece (niece-in-law? Soon to be niece-in-law? You know what I mean.) I have always, always loathed “The Bridal March”. To my ears it sounds creepy and sinister. I have never played it and never will.
I went for something very, very untraditional but which (when I stumbled upon it) knew in an instant it’s what I wanted.
When I walk down the aisle this weekend, surrounded by family, it will be to the song you can listen to here (beside “Music Download” you can click the box that says “Listen”. You won’t regret it.)
And that – along with my family – makes me happy.
-S.
Congratulation!!! I hope the rest of the week goes by slow enough to get everything done and that your wedding is perfect. I sincerely hope, wish, and pray for you all the happiness and success you two could wish for yourselves.
With great cyber love and affection,
Solomon
Sorry I didn’t RSVP or send a card. :)
COUGH! Your nose is doing a Pinocchio, lady!
And love the Tune. So emotive. There’s gonna be sniffles, you know.
I listened. BEAUTIFUL
*Bounce* squeal *bounce* OK OK indoor voice now.
I let my fiance and my mother plan my wedding. After the Epic Battle of the Dress (I had a nice cheap pink satin thing. My mother freaked and got me a made-to-measure floor-length full-on full-skirted Queen of Hearts number that cost more than our honeymoon. Umm. OK. I resign). I became so laid back I turned into a sofa-cushion. A triumph of laid-backness. The night before The Day, my mother came up to me with a face like whey cheese and told me they’d forgotten to order any glasses. Any. At all. I peed myself laughing (and we all went to Oddbins and begged).
I had a similar approach to my wedding, after we’d done the music. (And by “done” I mean “written” because that’s who we are.) We got married specifically when the church was decorated for the season so we wouldn’t have to. My mother-in-law did the food and I answered as you did to your prospective mum-in-law. “You know what you’re doing.”
Of course, part of it was that we were dead broke, so anyone who volunteered something was taken at their word. It worked out pretty well— my only regret was that more of our friends couldn’t attend. (One eight-person table. Seriously. Too close to college and nobody had travel monies.)
LOVE that version of the song…perfect for a wedding. Congratulations, Shannon! I cannot wait to see pictures!!! <3
Its gonna be great.
Perhaps I ought to elaborate that I am doing deprecatory jazz-hands and disowning the baking compliment…?
First of all, since a busy weekend is coming up for me too (the Fourth and two nephews’ birthdays) and I might not get back here again by the time the wedding happens, just want to sincerely wish you and Alastair a happy, joyful wedding with friends and family, as well as a fabulous honeymoon, and a positive future for the two of you and the kids (all four).
Second, nothing wrong with a laid back wedding. After all, weddings are only for one day, but the marriage will be (hopefully) a lot longer. That’s what we chose to focus on when my wife & I got married.
Third, two thumbs up for your choice of “walk down the aisle” music. Love it!
Fourth, you are truly wonderful for giving Jeff a loving, stable environment for the summer where he knows there is always a place for him away from whatever chaos he has to live with in Sweden (and not just because he’s family either). My wife & I have an (almost) nine year old nephew who has to live with his own share of dysfunction and we’re going to give him a day of his own later this week for his birthday, away from the usual BS he has to put up with in his life. All kids need to know that somewhere there is a place they can go where they’ll always get positive attention and love, and be away from the dysfunction that may permeate their normal everyday lives.
Wah! I can’t access that site – can someone tell me what the song is PUH-LEEZE!!
I love Snow Patrol. That whole album makes me cry, though.
Flikka, the song is “Chasing Cars” from Snow Patrol’s “Eyes Open” album.
I want to bounce up and down with happiness for you!
Good call on the wedding march. The traditional one is from a tragic opera where all sorts of nastiness ensues.
Oh, and I should have mentioned that said opera was about a wedding.
I’m excited about the wedding! Any chance of broadcasting live to the internet so we can all watch? ;)
Beautiful music. I’ve added it to my list of happy music.
Thanks D! Love that song too! xxx
Congratulations to you and Alastair. May you have a long and happy life together. I was just thinking that the wedding was coming up quickly
You know, I never thought about it before, but I think that’s a perfect wedding song!
My wedding was the following: I took care of the details by booking a flight to Key West, booking a hotel for the week, booking a sunset cruise + wedding, and buying some flowers at the grocery store (luckily, it was Mother’s Day, so the selection was quite nice!). Our guest list was…non-existent. We opted to not invite anyone. My dress was from the outlet mall. The lady on the boat took care of champagne and cake. We went to Benihana afterwards for dinner. It was delightful.
Your wedding is here…already?
I’m so so pleased for you I don’t know what to say. I can feel the excitement in your post even if you don’t think it’s there…and HFF confirms it! I love it! I’ll be thinking of you, in a non-stalkerish way…of course.
I so wish I could be there. I would love to see it. And you of course.
Best of everything to you and your family, Shannon! So looking forward to pictures. Maybe you should give Jeff a camera and ask him to get candids of the crowd. So we can feel like we went. Sort of. In a non-stalkerish way. ;)
Brilliant song to walk down the aisle to! I am also spectacularly untraditional, and used music from Lord of the Rings. AND I had chocolate cake.
congratulations, and beautiful!
Best wishes and congratulations, I am so happy for all of you. Wish I could be there; hope you get jillions of photos and will share them with us later. I like your song choice.
beautiful song! Good luck, I hope all these next few days go smoothly. It sounds like it’s going to be so much fun!!
One of my favorite Snow Patrol songs…sounds great in the piano only version. Perfect for walking down the aisle!
Congrats. May you find great happiness and joy in each other that lasts forever.
I hope you all have a wonderful time! I loved my wedding and I had pretty much the same attitude that you do. Funny, though – so much goes on that the next day, I could barely remember any of it…
What beautiful music… you will be so relaxed and happy when you walk down the aisle that your smile will blind all your guests (just kidding).
Happiness is always best when shared — thank you for sharing yours with us! May you have a glorious weekend.
Wishing you a bright, sunny perfect day for your wedding and many years of continued happiness. Congratulations!
Congratulations to you and the entire family!
The song is beautiful, and seems to me to be perfect for you. Enjoy the day, and the beginning of your next life.
Much, much love and luck for your wedding! You have EXACTLY the right attitude to have a fabulous day.
So So happy for you all. Congrats! Also, Snow Patrol is fantastic and this rendition is really beautiful.
Happy Fourth of July and more importantly happy wedding day! :)
That is the perfect song… I adore it!
That’s one of my favourite songs! Best wishes!
Hope you have a lot of people to eat the bagels before they go stale!
I love that song. I will play that if I ever have a wedding. It’s perfect.